Sam climbed from the driver’s seat and walked across the hospital parking lot feeling considerably more rested and better than he had that morning. Ethan had been right to send him off to the motel room, and to recommend stopping at a drug store on the way. A healthy dose of Tylenol had put down the headache enough that his sleep had been genuinely restful.

“Excuse me.” A man rose next to him as he stalked purposefully into the hospital lobby with full intent to just storm on through to Miss Parker’s room.

Sam turned his head – it was the sweeper that he’d forestalled up on the mountain. “What the hell are you doing here?” he glowered at the man.

“I figure that I have two choices,” Al said, his gaze not flinching from the intensity of Sam’s brilliant blue stare. “I’m either a dead man for failing to execute that termination order up on the mountain, or I cast in my lot with yours and help stand guard for her.” His face showed his determination. “I can tell you with of those two options I prefer.”

Sam still wasn’t convinced. “How do I know that this isn’t just another attempt to get close to Miss Parker?” he demanded, ready to spring and pounce at a moment’s notice.

“You know that I’m expendable either way,” Al reasoned with him. “If I take out Miss Parker, I’m a loose end that could be handled with great convenience and very little trouble. That means that even if I succeed, I’m still probably a dead man. I’ve seen some of the mercies of the Tower – I really would rather not take any chances. So the way I see it, if I want to live, casting in my lot with you and Miss Parker is really my only choice.”

“Give me your sidearm,” Sam demanded, thrusting his hand out.

Al looked him in the eye for a long moment and then pulled his pistol from his shoulder holster and deposited it in the other sweeper’s big hand. “I have a secondary,” he stated with utter calm. “You want that one too?”

Sam’s eyes narrowed. This guy could be trying to win points and get closer by appearing completely cooperative and sincere. This was, after all, a Lyle plot device. “Yeah,” he said finally, “that one too.”

Al put his foot up on the chair he’d been sitting in and pulled the much smaller pistol from an ankle holster and handed it over without hesitation. “You want to frisk me?”

“I’m thinking about it,” Sam answered in frustration. Either the guy was on the level, or he was very, VERY good as a cleaner. “Move it. I’ll let Miss Parker make the final decision.”

Al led the way into the hospital corridor. “Where are we headed?”

“Room 107,” Sam answered, still very much on alert. “Just keep going.”

~~~~~~~~*

“What do you want me to do?” Erin asked the detective on the other end of the line.

Lowe glanced at Bridges, who was still on the phone with the FBI. “Call him back,” he directed and then closed his eyes and prayed. “Take him up on his offer. Do you think you can go out with him without giving away that you’re part of the reason he’s being investigated in relation to Miss Fu’s death?”

“I don’t know,” Erin whimpered. “It’s still possible that he didn’t do anything – right?”

“Its possible, but very unlikely. I’m sorry,” Lowe told her apologetically. “And we need a window of time to look into things in Delaware when he wouldn’t be likely to know about it. If you don’t think you can do it…”

“It would only have to be dinner, right?” Erin demanded. “I wouldn’t have to keep him occupied more than just an hour or so, right?”

“If we can get the warrants we want, an hour or so would be just about right.” Lowe was watching Bridges’ reactions to the conversation with the FBI closely, and then breathed a huge sigh of relief when his partner looked over at him and nodded broadly. The FBI was on board and lining up the warrant to search Mr. Lyle Parker’s apartment even now. “Besides, you call him back on your phone line, and we’ll know where you are and when you’d be there. We would have you under surveillance the whole time, just in case…”

“In case he tries to do me like he did Cherry?” Erin asked, her voice getting hard. “If he’s the guy that killed her, then I want to help put him away for the rest of his life.”

“But you can’t give away that you’re starting to have doubts about him,” Lowe warned her quickly. “If we’re right about this guy, he’s very, VERY dangerous. And smart too. You’ll have to behave as if you’re just as infatuated with him now as you were the last time you saw him.”

“I can do that,” Erin said with a sudden rush of determination. “For Cherry – to pay him back for what he did to her.”

Lowe nodded. The young woman was a trooper all right – he could only hope to keep her safe while a quick search of Mr. Parker’s apartment checked to see if there was anything incriminating that would warrant his arrest. “We’ll be in touch as soon as you have your plans made with him, Miss Patterson. Just keep your cool and don’t let him know that you’ve changed in your regard for him.”

“I won’t,” Erin told both the detective and herself firmly. “I’ll talk to you later.”

Lowe replaced the receiver on the cradle and turned to his partner. “The FBI’s going to play ball with us?”

“We keep them in the loop so that they can handle things on the Delaware end. They’ll handle the search, in return for giving Baltimore first whack at him if they find anything incriminating.” Bridges jerked his nose in the direction of the telephone. “What about our young friend?”

“She’s going to return the call and make the date,” Lowe informed his partner. “She’s scared, but she wants to help put Cherry Fu’s murderer away – especially if he turns out to be the man she dated the night after Cherry was killed.”

“Just as long as she doesn’t end up being his last victim,” Bridges worried.

~~~~~~~~*

Miss Parker held a finger up as Sam walked into her room and continued to listen very carefully to the voice on the other end of Ethan’s cell phone. “Very well – I’ll expect you tomorrow afternoon,” she told Mr. Abé. “Have a safe journey.” She punched the disconnect button and handed the phone back to her brother. “Tomorrow should be interesting.” She then gave over her complete attention to Sam and the man who had come into the room in front of him. “Who’s this?”

Sam nodded as Al glanced backwards for instructions. “Tell her what you told me,” Sam said, giving a vague motion with his hand. “It’s her decision – so she needs to know.”

Miss Parker could hear the note of wariness in Sam’s voice. “Sam, what’s going on here?”

“My name is Al Douglas, Miss Parker,” Al began. “I don’t know if you remember me, but I trained under you when you were still in charge of teaching martial arts at Corporate.”

Miss Parker’s eyes narrowed. “You do look familiar,” she admitted. “What can I do for you?”

Al glanced back at Sam and then took a deep breath. “You could let me work for you – assist Mr. Atkins here in keeping you safe.”

Miss Parker shifted in bed and then reached for the remote that ran her bed. She raised the head of the bed so that she had just a little more support as she sat upright. As she came more upright, she studied the face of the man before her. “You’re a sweeper – your loyalty is to the Centre, is it not?”

Al winced and then faced her directly. “Twenty-four hours ago, I would have agreed with that one hundred percent. But then my partner and I got sent on a couple of termination orders that weren’t kosher – no code name, no paperwork, no pictures. Two days ago, it was just a termination order – two men and a kid – no biggie.”

Miss Parker’s eyes met Sam’s, and the sweeper could see that she wasn’t impressed with the nonchalance with which Al was talking about killing Broots and Debbie at least. “So what’s different now?”

“The termination order that came in on you and Doctor Green didn’t have a code name or paperwork either,” he told her, “and was marked ‘urgent’. After Mr. Atkins here convinced me not to do anything yesterday morning up on the mountain, I got to thinking. And what I came up with doesn’t exactly make a man want to stay loyal, if you know what I mean.” He took a small step forward. “I don’t want to see my life thrown into the shit can because I followed an improper termination order on one of the top officers of the Centre, Miss Parker. And if I don’t want to see my life thrown into the shit can for disloyalty, I figure the only thing I can do is stick it out in your service.”

Finally Miss Parker looked up at Sam. “Well?”

Sam shrugged. “He’s got a point. No code name and no paperwork gives Lyle plausible deniability with the Triumvirate on both sets of termination orders – and a damned good excuse to go sweeper-hunting the moment his position is secured. On the other hand,” he continued, and Al turned to look at him, “he could be playing us – getting close to you so he CAN execute the termination order.”

Miss Parker looked over at her brother. “Ethan?”

The young man gazed evenly at the older sweeper. “There’s nothing – no danger.”

“Give him his firearms back,” Miss Parker told Sam, “we can use all the support we can get.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Sam handed Al back both guns, which were immediately stowed in the appropriate holsters.

“Al.” The sweeper’s head swept up at the simple utterance. “Nothing personal, but I’d like to speak to Sam alone.”

“Yes, ma’am.” He pulled down his trouser leg and walked calmly from the room.

She looked over at her brother again. “I’d like to talk to Sam for a minute. You don’t mind, do you?”

Ethan shook his head and rose to his feet to walk out.

Sam walked a little closer to her bed. “What?”

“Broots said that you have a concussion?” She narrowed her eyes at him. “What the hell are you doing out of bed?”

Sam didn’t flinch beneath the stormy gaze. “I’m making sure you stay safe,” he answered calmly, “and doing it the only way I know how.”

“How’s the head?”

He did manage a chagrined smile. “Better, ma’am. Sleeping helps.”

“I don’t want you taking unnecessary risks,” she cautioned.

“Nothing I’ve done has been unnecessary, Miss Parker,” he returned in a business-like tone.

“If you hurt, I want to know about it.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“You have an assistant now,” she pointed out very distinctly.

“Yes, ma’am.” If her concern on his behalf weren’t so obvious, he’d have felt as if he were being disciplined. Although on second thought, he thought to himself, that was exactly what she was doing. “I’m OK, Miss Parker,” he reassured her.

She settled back against her pillows. “I’ll be getting a visit from Mr. Abé from the Triumvirate tomorrow,” she told him. “I want you and Al there. I don’t want him to think I’m in a vulnerable position – even though I am.”

“Just as long as you save enough of Lyle for me, ma’am,” Sam answered slowly and softly. “I owe him one big time.”

“We’ll both be getting back some of our own from him,” she promised him, “one way or the other. That I promise you.”

“Yes, ma’am.” They exchanged cold smiles.

“Tell Ethan he can come back in – and send Al to keep an eye on Syd’s door. I think we’re going to get some reinforcements soon, courtesy of Mr. Abé – but until then…”

“Gotcha,” Sam nodded. He turned with a smile on his face. She might be down, but she sure as hell wasn’t out – and it was good to have his old boss back again.

~~~~~~~~~*

Jarod sat in the car, staring at the façade of the hospital.

“Sitting here isn’t going to accomplish anything,” Bennings told him sympathetically. “You have to walk in there, and you have to actually have to talk to them.”

“I know,” Jarod said softly. “I just…”

“Is this my big, brave Security Chief I see quailing at the idea of having to break down and talk to his mentor and one of his old friends?” Bennings chided sharply. When Jarod turned with a glare, he shrugged. “Just calling it as I see it, my man. Prove me wrong.”

Jarod set his mouth in a thin line and climbed from behind the wheel. “You have no idea how hard what you’re asking me to do really is,” he shot over the roof of the car to where Bennings was climbing out too.

“I have a fair idea,” Bennings assured him, “I just know that once you’ve done it, you’ll be glad I sat on you until you did something.”

“I don’t like not being the one in control of the encounter,” Jarod complained as he walked slowly across the asphalt toward the front door of the hospital lobby.

“You’ll get over it, I promise,” Bennings told him with a hand at his shoulder in case he decided to hesitate again. “Whom do you want to talk to first?”

“Parker,” Jarod answered immediately. “I think, anyway…”

“You’re going to want privacy to do this,” Bennings said.

“Sam will understand,” Jarod stated with certainty. “So will Ethan.”

“Who are they?”

“Sam is Miss Parker’s personal sw… bodyguard,” Jarod answered, his eyes focused straight ahead. “Ethan is my half-brother – and Parker’s half-brother too.”

The hand on Jarod’s shoulder tightened and pulled Jarod to a halt. “Wait a minute! You mean to tell me that you and Parker share a half-brother?”

Jarod turned to look at his friend. “Trust me – it’s a very long and complicated story that has to do with the Centre trying to make more like me.”

Bennings sighed. “You have to admit, this all sounds pretty far fetched.”

“You don’t know the half of it,” Jarod commented and began moving forward again.

Michelle stepped out of Sydney’s room for a moment, and then stopped still in utter amazement. “Jarod! I thought…”

“Michelle Stamatis, Carl Bennings,” Jarod made the introduction in order to avoid having to explain to Sydney’s long-lost love that his friend had twisted his arm to come back and at least speak to his mentor.

“Is Sydney awake?” Bennings asked gently.

“Yes,” Michelle answered with a frown.

“We’re here - let me talk to him first,” Bennings asked Jarod. “Looks like Lady Luck wants you to talk to Sydney.”

Jarod shrugged, and Bennings pushed through the hospital room door under Al’s watchful eye.

“Why?” Michelle asked again, determined not to be put off this time.

“Because… Carl convinced me that I can’t truly be free of the Centre to enjoy my future without dealing with my past.” Jarod squirmed beneath her steady gaze.

“You have a wise friend,” Michelle commented quietly.

“Who happens to be my boss and sign my paycheck,” Jarod admitted wryly. “When he says ‘no, no, you need to go back and deal with this,’ there isn’t a whole lot I can do about it…”

In the hospital room, Sydney rolled slightly to smile at Michelle when she came back, but then froze. “You!” He blinked and then stared as Bennings walked over to his bed. “But… I thought you’d already been released from here.”

“I have been,” Bennings smiled down at the old man. “But I knew I owed you for having hurt you when I thought we were going to be rescued.” He looked at the cervical collar. “And it looks like I did some real damage after all…”

“Don’t worry about it,” Sydney closed his eyes briefly. “I shouldn’t have done half of what I did up there – I probably caused my own problems.”

“Still,” Bennings shook his head. “I felt that I owed you then, and now I know I have a good way to make amends.” He lifted a finger to the man in the bed. “Don’t go away. There’s someone here to see you.” He stuck his head out the door and beckoned to Jarod. “Time for you to make things right,” he said, jerking his thumb over his shoulder. “I’ll make sure you’re not interrupted.”

Jarod glanced at Michelle, who just smiled. “If not for your sake, then at least for Sydney’s,” she said softly. “Go on. I’ll stay out here with your friend.”

Bennings’ hand landed warm and supportive on Jarod’s shoulder as the Pretender moved past him and through the door. Jarod’s eyes were completely on the man in the bed, who was watching the door expectantly. “Hello, Sydney,” the Pretender said softly.

The chestnut eyes were wide, and Sydney’s mouth gaped. “Jarod?” he whispered and then lifted a hand toward his former protégé. “My God! Jarod! I thought you’d already left.”

“I had,” Jarod admitted, moving closer and taking his old mentor’s hand, “I came back.”

Sydney studied the face of his former protégé. Jarod looked fit and well-fed, his face had gained few lines in the years since he’d seen him last except a few laugh lines at the edges of his eyes. “You look well,” the psychiatrist stated, feeling a little unsure as to how to allow the conversation to progress past superficialities.

“You, on the other hand, look like you’ve been put through a ringer,” Jarod responded honestly, but with a smile. “I’m glad you managed to get out of that mess alive.”

Sydney averted his eyes. “Yes, well…” He looked back up again. “Bennings is your friend?”

“Yes,” Jarod replied, choosing not to disclose his more professional affiliation. “I was very worried about him. I didn’t even know that you and Miss Parker were involved in that flight until I called Broots when I couldn’t reach you…”

Sydney’s bruised brows pulled together. “When were you trying to reach me?”

“When Raines died in that car bomb, of course.” When Sydney’s eyes opened wide and his mouth dropped slightly open to gape, Jarod stared. “You didn’t know.”

“Raines… is dead?”

Jarod nodded. “And Lyle, it seems, decided you and Miss Parker and Sam and Broots were threats to his being able to move into the Chairman’s seat smoothly – and he sent out cleaners to take care of you.” He gave Sydney’s hand a gentle squeeze and then let go so that he could reach for a chair and sit down. “Sam took care of the one that went up to the crash site – Ethan and I gave a small assist in nailing the one who came here to the hospital.”

“And Lyle?”

Jarod shrugged. “That’s Miss Parker’s end of things. You’ll have to ask her.”

Sydney looked at Jarod for a long moment without speaking, then: “Why did you come back?”

“Carl Bennings is my boss, and when he decided I should…”

“Unh-uh.” The old man moved his head just perceptibly, as much of a negation as he dared. “I know you better than that, Jarod. If you were truly determined not to get any closer, nothing anybody could have said would have convinced you otherwise – boss or no.” Jarod looked down at his hands, folded in his lap. Sydney knew that withdrawal well – it was a signal he was on the right track. “I thought so. So why come back?”

“I thought I’d finally escaped,” Jarod began at last, his voice soft and his words coming slowly. “I’d finally dropped below the Centre radar – stopped leaving you and Miss Parker convenient little clues – and I’d found my family. I’d done the right thing and gotten legitimate certificates to authorize me to do my job. And I’d stopped having the nightmares. I bought a house, I began to entertain – to live. I wasn’t moving every couple of weeks – I was learning what it meant to be in the same place willingly for weeks and months on end. I thought I was free – that I was living a normal life.”

“You deserve a normal life,” Sydney commented gently. “I’m glad you have that now.”

“It was a lie I was telling myself,” Jarod replied, looking into his mentor’s eyes with a sharp and penetrating gaze. “And all it took was finding out that you and Parker were on that United flight to bring it all back – the nightmares, the wondering whether I’d stayed too long in one place, and…” He fell silent.

“And?”

Jarod rose and walked to the window and looked out over what in spring and summer would have been a very pretty grassed alcove. “I remembered how much there was that I’d never settled – with you, with Parker – and for the first time in years, I found myself wishing I had another chance. Then Ethan came, and he told me that Parker at least was still alive. I had my job to do – to figure out who was trying to kill Carl – but every time I turned around, I ran into the thought of you and Parker up on that mountain.”

Sydney continued to watch his former student closely. “That doesn’t explain why you turned around and came back once you knew we were safe and you’d walked away again,” he pointed out with gentle bluntness.

Jarod’s shoulders sagged just a little for a brief moment. “I left because I had a job to do – to get Carl to San Francisco. You’re right – you two were safe again. And I had the opportunity to do what I’d always done and just dance away out of the Centre’s – your – reach, and I took it. I told myself I could go back to forgetting now again – I could stop wondering…”

“Wondering what?”

Suddenly the old psychiatrist was pinned by a sharp chocolate gaze that gave no quarter. “If things had been different, would you have loved me back then?”

The question went straight to Sydney’s heart. Up on the mountain, he and Parker had wiped their slate clean of all the baggage of an entire lifetime that had gone before – all in favor of being able to at least admit a fondness for the other that had been buried and ignored. Was he ready to do the same thing with Jarod?

“If things had been different – if it hadn’t been necessary to maintain absolute objectivity both to protect the work and keep from giving others power over the both of us,” Sydney stated slowly, “you wouldn’t need to be asking the question. Just because I never allowed myself to think about it doesn’t mean the feelings weren’t there. I cared…”

A deep pain welled up in those bright chocolate eyes. “If you cared after all, then why?”

“Why did I not try to rescue you?” Sydney filled in the rest of the question. Jarod nodded wordlessly. “Because,” the Belgian answered, “my reason for being there had to do with more than just you. If I’d tried to rescue you, I’d have left behind others who needed what little protection I could give them – and if I failed, then all of you would have been the ones to suffer.”

“You let them take me…”

“I didn’t allow ANY of that, Jarod,” Sydney snapped tiredly. “It happened when I was gone or in a position where I couldn’t prevent it – but I was never a willing part of it, nor did I ever give my permission that you…” He stopped. “You have to understand that I wasn’t in control as much as you’d like to think I was. I wish I had been.” His chestnut gaze now pierced and held Jarod’s. “I would have gotten you all out – you, Parker, Angelo, Kyle, Alex, Damon, all the others – I would have called in the authorities if I thought it would have done any good. I would have given the rest of my life to return you to your families, if that were possible. But I couldn’t.”

The old man closed his eyes. “At the most, I could have complained more – resisted more – and what would that have ultimately accomplished?” He opened his eyes to glare at his protégé. “You’ve dealt with the Centre at a distance – you know what they’re capable of. You know what they do to those who don’t toe the company line. What would you have had me do, Jarod?”

Jarod tore his gaze from Sydney’s. These were things he’d tried not to hear, not to understand, for the entire time he’d been free. The thought that his mentor – the man he had believed virtually omnipotent for so long – had been just as powerless as he’d been was hard to swallow. And yet, so many of the revelations of just how much a victim Sydney had been over the years had come at his behest. How could he have missed the connection?

Still, he had one last card to play. “After I got away – one of those times you and I were talking over the phone, I asked you if you’d ever cared. You said…”

“I told you the truth, even though I knew you wouldn’t like it,” Sydney told him sadly. “It’s true that I never allowed myself to consider the possibility. But…” he raised a finger. “Not consciously considering the possibility doesn’t negate what the heart did anyway. Do you honestly think that, if I’d not cared, I’d have helped you rescue Gemini? Given you the formula that I’d been giving Angelo so that you could rescue that new Pretender they were trying to steal?”

“That could have been the result of a guilty conscience,” Jarod blurted defensively.

Sydney stopped and considered the statement. “In a way, I suppose, you’re right. I did feel guilt about not being able to save you, so I did the next best thing. But then again, I was finally in a position where I COULD help – where I’d been unable to do anything for you more than I’d already done. I did keep you out of Raines’ hands, after all – you didn’t end up a sociopath like Kyle and Damon.”

“What about now?” Jarod whispered softly.

“What about now?” Sydney returned.

“Do you still care – or is it too late?”

Sydney’s face softened and he once more gave that almost imperceptible shake of the head. “Jarod, Jarod. Haven’t you heard a word of what I said – that while I may have SAID nothing, the feelings were there anyway? Do you honestly think that your living the past few years incommunicado would have made me care any less now?”

“I just wanted a father who loved me,” Jarod whispered brokenly. “I just wanted you to love me.”

“I am not your father, Jarod,” Sydney replied gently, “and pretending I was back then would have been a grave disservice to your real father, with whom you deserve a full relationship. By keeping my distance, I tried to make sure you had the emotional space for such a relationship to exist if and when the time came. But that doesn’t mean that, in a deep, dark corner of my soul that never got sold to the Centre, I didn’t think of you as the son I never had – nor does it mean that I love you any less now than I did when we were working together.”

“You care?”

“I care,” Sydney confirmed, “and I always have.” He lifted his hand toward Jarod. “I have always been very proud of you.”

Jarod took the hand and let Sydney pull him down into a very careful hug. He closed his eyes and rested very gently against the chest of the man he still considered as a father – and finally knew the freedom of loving and being loved in return by the one person who had been a constant in his life.

Sydney rubbed Jarod’s back in small circles and comforted the man in the way he’d so often wished he’d dared comfort the child. Not all the issues between them were settled – not by a very long shot – but the most important ones, the ones that had prevented any communication at all, hopefully had been dealt with properly. Forgiveness – Jarod’s forgiving him and his forgiving himself – could come later, as other issue found their resolution too.

If the result of being in this accident was that his relationships with the two most important people in his life become more supportive and less dysfunctional, then all the pain was worth it.

~~~~~~~~~*

Erin stared at the phone, trying to steel herself for picking it up and dialing. This had to be one of the hardest things she’d ever done – and she could only pray that the detectives would be able to live up to their promise to have a tail on her by the time this was going down. She sniffled and rubbed her nose with the back of her hand as she thrust the face of her dead friend into the fore of her mind. She was doing this for Cherry. If Lyle was the killer, she was doing this so that the police could prove it.

She sniffed again and reached for the receiver and dialed the number that had been left on her answering machine. It rang only once.

“Hello?”

“Hi.” It was the only thing she could manage at the moment.

“Erin?” God, he even sounded concerned – worried. Was it all a lie? “Erin, is that you?”

“I got your message,” she said at last. “I don’t know if I’d be very good company…”

“I told you, I didn’t want you to go through this alone.” Lyle repeated. “Will you let me at least take you out to dinner and give you a shoulder to lean on for a while?”

Erin’s eyes searched the ceiling tile for wisdom, and then took a deep breath. “OK.”

“Do you work tomorrow?” he wanted to know.

“No,” she sighed and wiped the tears from her cheek with the back of her unencumbered hand. “I have classes all day.”

“What time will you be back home then?”

God, but she didn’t want to do this! “About four,” she answered. “Why don’t you swing by after five – give me a chance to freshen up a bit.”

“OK,” Lyle said gently. “Don’t dress up – we’re not going anywhere fancy. Just somewhere so that I know that you’re eating properly and where we can have a little privacy.”

“I’ll see you then,” Erin said, hoping to cut the conversation short.

“You take care,” Lyle worried at her again. “Goodbye.”

Erin hung the phone up with a shaking hand and then walked over to the counter where she’d left her orange juice and rum. She picked up the glass and took several swallows of the stiff drink and then leaned on the counter. When this was over – and if she didn’t’ get herself in too much trouble – she would go home.

Suddenly Mom and Dad’s caution and suspicious nature toward all of her dates in the past had a comforting feel to it. Big city living certainly wasn’t all it was cracked up to be.

~~~~~~~~~*

Bennings could see that the encounter with Sydney had taken its toll on Jarod – his friend’s eyes were puffy, as if he’d been crying. “You OK?” he asked in concern.

“I think I need to get a cup of coffee before I go talk to Parker,” Jarod said with a note of exhaustion. “I need to regroup a little.”

“But don’t you feel better for having come back and talked to him?” Bennings insisted on prying as they walked down the corridor together toward the cafeteria.

“Yeah,” Jarod nodded slowly. He DID feel better – at least, he didn’t feel driven to put miles and months between himself and Sydney. And the weight of fear of rejection had been lifted.

“I’ll bet you feel just that much better still once you’ve talked to your old best friend.”

“We’ll see,” Jarod hedged, putting two dollar bills into a machine and hearing a bottle of spring water tumble into the metal bin below. “Parker and I have a very… difficult… relationship. I have an uncommon knack for pissing her off.”

“Uh-huh.” Bennings muttered, waiting his turn with the drink machine and choosing a carbonated drink with caffeine in it. “I don’t think she’s the kind of woman one would want to have pissed off at one.”

“No,” Jarod chuckled, “especially when she’s toting her Smith and Wesson.”

Bennings’ eyes widened. “Yikes! I knew she’d be formidable – I had no idea she was deadly. Literally, that is…”

“Her heart’s in the right spot, even if she doesn’t want to admit it,” Jarod seated himself at one of the small tables that populated the virtually abandoned room. He threw his head back and closed his eyes. “God! If my sister knew what I was doing…”

“Emily? She doesn’t approve of these people?”

Jarod shook his head and slowly straightened up. “Emily despises them – blames them for all the years that we lost.”

“I suppose one can’t blame her,” Bennings commented and then took a long draught from his soda.

Jarod shrugged and tipped his head back so that he could down the rest of his water in one long series of gulps. “She’s very protective – of me, of our family.”

“She’s a formidable woman in her own right,” Bennings smiled in memory. “I’ve been meaning to ask you if she’s seeing anybody.”

There was a silent pause while Jarod straightened and gave his friend a long and searching look. “Why?”

Bennings smiled. “Pretty lady, lady reporter, independent and cagey – just seems like the kind of woman who wouldn’t be intimidated or overwhelmed by a multi-millionaire with a slight crush…”

“You… and my sister?” Jarod’s mouth gaped. “Why am I only now hearing of this?”

“Maybe I did it to rest your mind for a moment, so that you can go see Parker a little bit refreshed by the thought that you still have a life that exists beyond these people.” Bennings smiled and took another sip of his drink. “I trust that you’re not going to be resigning the moment your friends go home…”

Jarod shook his head in disbelief. “I shoulda known…” He rose. “I’d better go see Parker before visiting hours are over…”

“Jarod…” The Pretender turned. “I meant what I said about your sister – but we can discuss that later. I’ll make a few calls and get us some rooms while you do what you have to – and take your time in your talk with Miss Parker.”

Jarod pointed at him in response and set off down the corridor again. Bennings smiled to himself. Whatever was going on with these strangers who’d become acquaintances only by virtual mutual survival, at least he wasn’t losing his best friend. His smile grew. And Emily WAS an interesting woman…

~~~~~~~~~*

Sam frowned at the soft knock on Miss Parker’s door, and he stepped over to pull it open – and then gaped.

“Let me talk to her for a little while,” Jarod asked quietly, so that she couldn’t tell it was he in the corridor.

Sam eyed the Pretender cautiously. “She’s tired,” he warned. “Don’t make her too upset, OK?”

“You have my word.”

The look on Sam’s face told Jarod just how much the sweeper trusted his word, but Sam pushed past him and into the corridor, leaving only Miss Parker and Ethan in the room.

“Sam?” Miss Parker asked, suddenly noticing that her sweeper was no longer in the room. Her grey eyes widened as she saw the tall, dark-haired man standing by the door, and then narrowed defensively. “I thought you’d gone – escaped while you had the chance.”

“I came back – figured that I at least owed you a quick hello after all this time,” Jarod replied in a patently artificial lightness. He glanced at Ethan, who nodded and headed for the door.

“You don’t have to go,” Miss Parker called him back.

“I think you guys need some privacy,” Ethan shook his head and vanished through the door.

Miss Parker gazed at Jarod for a long time. “How come Sam let you in here?”

“I suppose because I helped him take down the sweeper that Lyle sent to kill you,” Jarod answered calmly. “He owed me one – this makes us even.”

“So…” Her voice turned cold and defensive again. “Are you here to gloat?”

“About what?”

“About your being here to save me in the nick of time, free as a bird to make friends like Carl Bennings and flit from here to there and back again, free to know where our brother is and visit him – while I’ve been stuck…”

“That’s not a joking matter, Parker, and you know it,” Jarod sighed. “I’m here to check up on a good friend – make sure she’s being treated right and getting better. That’s all.”

“What? No secrets to dangle in front of my nose today?” she snapped at him.

“Those days are finished, Parker,” Jarod replied gently. “Take the visit for what it is – one friend wondering how another is doing.”

“We aren’t friends, Jarod,” she reminded him archly.

“We were once,” he stated softly. “Truce, Parker, just for a few minutes. Then I’ll be gone again, and you can go back to hating me all you want.”

“That’s the story of my life,” Miss Parker leaned back in her pillows tiredly. “You get to go wherever you want to, and I’m still stuck…”

Jarod’s eyes finally grew cold. “If that’s how you want to play this, then fine. I’ve stopped by, asked after you, said hello. Obviously you’re in no mood to just relax and talk like a normal human being for a bit, so I’ll just move along. I’m sorry I thought that…” He stopped himself. “Forget it. Take care of yourself…”

“Jarod…”

“What?” He took an angry step toward her. “You think I’m going to stick around here so you can verbally abuse me? I have better things to do.”

That did it. “You left without so much as a ‘how are you’, you bastard – you expect me to just forget that?” she shouted at him. “And now you stomp around like a wounded bull because I hurt YOU? Wake up…”

“You OK, Miss Parker?” Sam peered around the edge of the doorway and glared at Jarod, whom he blamed for the sound of raised voices. “You need anything?”

“Get out, Sam,” she ordered sharply. “This is something between Jarod and me that’s been a long time coming – and I don’t want anybody getting in my way.” She waited for a moment and added when he refused to budge, “I’ll be fine. Just go on – he’ll be leaving in a moment.”

Sam shot Jarod another icy glare that told the Pretender that he’d be answering to the sweeper for upsetting Miss Parker anyway, and then withdrew.

“Wake up and smell the coffee, Jarod,” she repeated herself in a low and deadly voice. “You’ve done nothing BUT hurt me for years. You feed me tidbits about my mother and have me rolling over and sitting up to beg for more – and then disappear after leaving me with more questions than answers. You call me at two in the morning when I have to be at work at eight and wonder why I’m in a bad mood when I talk to you? You humiliate me in public so that you can escape with a smirk on your face – you vanish for years without so much as a farewell – and now you wonder why I don’t greet you with open arms now, thank you so much for deigning to visit poor little me in the hospital?” She glared at him. “It’s called ‘conditioning,’ Jarod – you come at me with a smile and I end up smarting often enough, I get the hint and respond accordingly.”

“All I’ve ever wanted…”

“That’s just it,” she hissed. “It’s always been about what YOU’VE wanted. I play your nice little pre-SIMmed scenario for you, give you the jollies with my expected reactions. To Hell with what I want – to Hell with how it makes me feel to be manipulated and used…”

“You didn’t seem to give a damn when it was your father or the Centre manipulating you,” Jarod hissed in return. “So obviously it wasn’t the aspect of being manipulated that was so bothersome…”

“Of course it was, you idiot!” she shook her head and then groaned as the movement set off echoes of agony in her shoulder. She put up a restraining hand, however, when Jarod dropped the attitude and would have come to her side. “When Daddy manipulated me, it hurt like hell – but I took it because I loved him and wanted him to love me back. You claimed you were my friend, and yet you manipulated me with the same callous attitude that my father did – and it hurt just as bad when you did it as when my father did it. But tell me, Jarod, what kind of friend did it make you to hurt me over and over again without so much as an apology? How dare you condemn what my father did when you were doing it yourself!”

Jarod stared at her, dumbfounded.

“Well, I’m done playing your little games,” she said finally, using the remote to lower the head of her bed. “I’m tired, I feel like shit, and I’m not in the mood. So you just go on – pat yourself on the back for being a ‘good friend’ and coming back to stop by after leaving once already. The thing is, a REAL friend wouldn’t have left in the first place.” She turned her head away from him toward the wall. “Get out. The Centre won’t know you were here – neither Sam nor I will say anything, and I’m sure Sydney would rather die than put you in danger. I assume you’ve spoken to him already…”

“Yes…”

“Then you’ve done your good deed, Jarod. You can ride off into the sunset now, white hat sparkling and silver bullets in your gun. Don’t let the door hit you in the ass on the way out.”

Jarod stumbled to the chair that Sam had been sitting in and sat down heavily. The stream of anger and pent-up frustration from her had been far more devastating than he’d expected – mostly because every word of it was true, from her perspective. “Why is it we always seem to go out of our way to hurt each other?” he asked after a very long time.

“Because that’s the only way we know how to act towards each other anymore,” she answered in an equally tired and depleted voice. “Because it’s the only way either of us knows to get past the walls the other has built up. It’s only after we’re both so much in pain we’re numb that we can talk properly – like right now.” She gave a bitter chuckle. “Syd would have a field day analyzing the two of us, you know… AFTER he got through chewing us both out royally, that is…”

“I didn’t come here to fight with you,” he said softly, “I didn’t come here to gloat; I didn’t come here to manipulate you or offer you hints and clues to new questions. I came because you were in my nightmares again after a long time – and I needed to know that you would be OK before I could make myself stop having those nightmares again.”

Miss Parker sighed heavily. “And it’s all about you and what you want again, isn’t it?”

Jarod sighed too. “Fine. Tell me what you want, then,” he challenged in a defeated tone. “If you want me to go away and never speak to you again, then that’s what I’ll do. Just say the word, and I’m out of your life for good. I don’t want to hurt you anymore.”

She was quiet for a long time. Finally she muttered “Shit,” without turning around.

Jarod let out a held breath of relief. “All right - if not that, then what?”

Another long moment of silence passed. “Are you leaving after we finish talking?” she asked, turning back to him finally.

“I don’t know,” he answered honestly. “It depends on what you want.”

“I don’t know what I want,” she replied eventually.

“Then I don’t know what to do other than just leave,” Jarod told her sadly. “I promised Carl that I’d get him to San Francisco. He was supposed to be there three days ago. I never make promises I don’t keep.”

It was amazing how empty she felt, now that she’d told him off the way she’d always wanted to – and how much it hurt to think that he would walk away again with those angry, hurtful words being pretty much the last memory he’d have of her. No – she couldn’t have that. “Will you at least stay in touch this time?”

Jarod blinked. “After everything you just said, do you still want me to?” After a long moment, she nodded. “Then I’ll be in touch - someday, when it won’t hurt either of us anymore,” he said softly. “I promise. Get well soon.” He pulled the door to the room open. “Goodbye, Miss Parker.”

Miss Parker turned away again, and the tears started rolling down her cheeks when she heard the door close softly, leaving her alone.

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